For a long time, my heart blamed you for everything that happened between us even as my head told me I had shared responsibility for the breakup. Anger, pride, selfishness, and impatience led to hurtful words, loss of relationship and mutual abandonment.
I rarely spoke about it then, and I rarely do now.
At the time, a former coworker noted that I seemed much “lighter and happier”, but the events that followed broke me. My health suffered, and I know yours did too. Strangely enough, even as guilt, shame, and a sense of failure set in, I still tried to defend you to others. I worked to give you the respect that I was unable to when we were a couple.
From what I have seen and experienced, unforgiveness, blame and a lack of trust are toxins that destroy relationship between people. This could be between spouses, family members, friends, co-workers, or romantic partners. These toxins are a by-product of sin, and each and every one of us is sin-filled. Because of this, we are all going to mess up at one time or another, even multiple times a day. We are going to disappoint ourselves and each other.
Except One: Jesus Christ, God, who became man and yet paradoxically remained fully divine. In the person of Jesus Christ, God entered our pain and suffering, and the long-promised rescue plan for humanity and all of creation was put in motion. Jesus is the only One who can restore our relationship with the Father and bring about our reconciliation with Him. Nothing and no one else can bring us the peace we so desperately need.
And so, I pray God moves powerfully in your life in a way that calls you to stand still long enough in the rat race and to reflect on where you want to spend eternity. If your answer is in heaven, put your trust in Jesus. He has assured us there is no other way, and He keeps his promises.
For my part, I am looking forward to eternity with My Savior in heaven where there will be no more sin to disrupt relationship. We women tend to feel these consequences more keenly than men, so perhaps this is not enough to encourage you to think more deeply about what you believe.
But if I do see you there: Because there is no more sin in heaven, we can enjoy perfect relationship, free of all that stuff we allowed to tear us apart. An absence of sin means the inhabitants of heaven will enjoy perfect relationship with each other.
Can you imagine what that would look like? Will you choose to believe? Would you consider putting your trust in Jesus?
Please know that I am not writing this for me. I no longer live in the past, and I haven’t for a very long time. I have found hope, forgiveness, and freedom in the saving work of Jesus Christ. My life is full, and my hope is secure.
I am writing this for you; that you may one day find the very same if you haven’t already.
All the best.
Photo credit: ipopba
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